DWN Data Logs
by quintetmaster456
Summary: A series of various one shots based around wily bots and them trying not to rip out one another's throats. So yeah if that's your thing come on and check this out. Requests are open so if you have something you want me to write go ahead and ask. Rating based on language and alcoholic references.
1. Enker Deals with Drunk Robots

**Made a bit of a quick format edit, I uploaded this late at night so I didn't quite realize the formatting fucking up due to copying from Google Docs. Thanks Itanimulli.**

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To put it lightly, Enker was not having the best of days. He had been dragged from his, admittedly boring, task of watchtower duty to participate in some sort of asinine scheme Star Man had thought up of more than likely, the reason being stated as 'adult supervision' which was bullshit. The group consisting of Star Man, Ballade, Tengu Man, and Gemini Man were all fully capable wily bots and none of them even aged or could even possibly be kids though considering some of Wily's other...unique designs, he honestly wouldn't have been surprised if they were. That being said here he was, running away from the cops with Star Man on one shoulder and Ballade on the other both in their civilian wear, while Tengu Man and Gemini Man had already been caught and like hell if he was going back for them! "God damn it! I knew I shouldn't have listened to Ballade about doing this!"

 _ **Approximately 8 Hours Ago**_

"I'm sorry what?" The golden clad MKN looked at one of the members of his line utterly baffled as to what he just asked. "I need you to come with me, Star,Tengu, and Gemini to the bar as adult supervision.." Ballade responded as if that question was completely normal to ask Enker. "Usually Shadow Man tags along but he's off doing something else tonight, I mean it's not that bad we don't tend to get all that drunk." Enker rubbed his temples as he thought this over, on one hand he REALLY didn't want to see Ballade get arrested or worse, he was the only thing holding him back from beating Punk with his own leg. On the other hand this entire concept was completely asinine to him that he was just baffled about the entire situation, "first off since when can we get drunk? Second off since when did you start doing this and how didn't I notice? Lastly why in god's name do you need 'adult supervision' to go to a damn bar!"

"Wily actually programmed us with the ability to get drunk, probably thought eventually one of us would make a good drinking buddy. I've been doing this for months now but you haven't noticed since the first two weeks and just took it as routine by the third. Also we need someone to make sure we don't get arrested for starting a bar fight." Enker blinked processing all of this information wondering if robots were capable of getting headaches and if so was their some sort of robot equivalent to aspirin, "fine, I'll do it. If one of you get arrested even with my supervision I'm not paying for bail." Ballade grinned nodding before making his way out of the guard tower. "This is going to go horribly…" Enker said shaking his head.

 _ **5 Hours Ago**_

"Ah Enker! There you are our gold clad assistance! I'm surprised Ballade managed to convince you to go out with us you grump." Star Man was the first thing Enker heard when he entered the garage of the Wily Fortress. "Yeah when Ballade told us you were going to be coming we couldn't believe our ears." One of the two Gemini Men had stated Tengu Man merely nodding as Ballade closed the hood of the car they were about to use. "Alright, all fixed up and gassed up we might want to get into our civilian forms." Ballade said his armor vanishing in a flash being replaced with a black duster jacket with a purple shirt accompanied by simple denim jeans and tennis shoes, his hair a rather intense shade of white slicked back and stopping right before his neck in length. Star Man was next his armor replaced by a golden waistcoat with a white button up underneath, his pants black and formal with his shoes being a similar color and just as formal. His blonde hair was loose coming down past his shoulders curling slightly at the edges and giving it an overall wavy appearance. Tengu man came next a black leather jacket with a red stripe on the arms and a green t-shirt with tight ripped jeans as well as a red fabric mask which came up to his nose and covered the lower half of his face, his hair a rather jarring green colored mohawk buzz cut at the sides with a topknot in the center. The Gemini Men as was expected were both dressed in the same outfit, a light blue t-shirt with jeans and matching tennis shoes with their just as blue hair messy and short but somehow just as identical as the rest of them.

All of them then looked at Enker confused as he hadn't changed out of his armor. "What? I'll do it when we're on the way there." Ballade sighed as he looked at his associate, "seriously Enker? Nobody is going to laugh at your civilian form and you're too pissed constantly to let anyone be less intimidated by you." Enker merely glared at his successor as he sighed out his armor vanishing. The Gemini Men were in hysterics as the fearsome killer was dressed in a yellow skirt coming down to his knees alongside a rather feminine dark blue top and yellow heels, what had also been a bit of a surprise was the long golden ponytail that went down to Enker's waist in perfect condition. Enker was then held back by Ballade as he tried to strangle the life out of Gemini Man, "Ballade I swear to god if you don't let me go I'll strangle you right afterwards!" The other two robot masters were more confused than anything else. "You even sound like a girl in your civilian outfit! Seriously the bitchy attitude fits if you're a chick." Enker desperately tried breaking free from Ballade's grip at the Gemini Man's comment shouting and ranting about how he'd rip out their optics and eat them before gutting them with his spear. "Alright enough Gemini Man, Enker isn't a girl his civilian form however was programmed before Wily decided to ditch the whole 'make a robot like Roll' thing." Ballade stated hoping to calm everyone down, Gemini Man however only laughed harder at that comment as Enker's glare grew even more intense at Ballade before the other MKN realized his mistake. Surprisingly enough Star Man was the one to ease the tension with a simple

"Well I think he looks gorgeous, I must say he can wear that outfit far better than I could. Also honestly I've seen you wear far worse Gemini or must I bring up your new years outfit.~" He said with a smirk the twins instantly shutting up and looking on shocked at Star Man. "You wouldn't dare."

"I think we both know I very much would, I mean it's prime blackmail material." The two cyan dressed robots shut up shortly afterwards as Enker had mostly calmed down due to the compliments. "Alright now if my outfit and voice aren't hot topics anymore I still have to drive you to the damn bar." Enker stated getting in the driver's seat as the other five piled in. "You've been pretty quiet Tengu what's up?" Ballade whispered to the air based robot master. "I've just been more in shock at what's happened in the past ten minutes more than anything." Ballade merely nodded as they went on their way.

 _ **3 hours ago**_

Finally making it to the bar the night was in full swing for the wily bots turns out today was karaoke night which made Enker already regret his decision in coming to supervise. It had barely been about half an hour and unsurprisingly Star Man was already drunk his words slurring together as he tried desperately to sing on stage, surprisingly however Ballade was just as drunk with a similar amount of drinks and was singing right along side Star. "So you guys do this every week." Enker asked a bit annoyed at how loud the bar was getting due to it being rather busy as Tengu Man nodded setting down his sake. "Yeah, usually those two black out a few hours in. Gemini Man usually gets in long arguments with himself about nothing before they both start crying and trying to apologize to the other one which will probably happen right around now." If on cue loud shouting was heard from nearby snippets of "You always eat everything I want to eat!" and "Well you're the one who keeps putting the crystal polish in the wrong places!" which actually made it somewhat worth it to the feminine bot who then asked, "What about you?"

"Oh I just get really philosophical and tend to ask questions which make people question their existence due to how drunk everyone around here gets...that or I try to break a bottle over someone's head if they piss me off." Enker took note of that as a waitress came by placing a shot by him, "I didn't order this." He stated simply as she smiled pointing over at a guy currently looking at the bot sitting down at the bar. "Tengu make sure those two don't do anything stupid and don't drink more until I get back." He said the other sober robot nodding as the designated driver proceeded to move to the guy.

"Hey there, I haven't seen you round here thought I'd buy something for a lovely new fa-" "Cut the crap. I don't need to be hit on tonight. Fuck off." He said simply before turning away that was until the man grabbed her shoulder "Hey wait I'm sor-" the man didn't get to finish his statement as Enker grabbed his wrist twisting it painfully. "What. Did. I. Just. Say." The man made various pained noises before saying, "Ok ok ok sorry! I was dared by a friend! Please let go!" Enker obliged before hearing a glass bottle shatter, turning around quickly and seeing Tengu Man with a broken bottle in his hand looking quite pissed. "God fucking damn it…."

 _ **Current Time**_

As it turns out Ballade had outright decked the man running karaoke because he was "startled" by the sudden appearance he had on stage. Which when you're punched by a drunk robot built for killing tended to knock you out. This was when chaos broke out as Star Man screamed out fainting as the bar broke into hysterics, this of course pissed the slightly drunk Tengu Man who broke a bottle over someone's head before starting to punch out anyone who came anywhere close to him. The Gemini Men had also resorted to violence trading blows with each other in the chaos as multiple people tried to take Tengu Man down who only seemed to shake off everything only to take out more people who came at him.

Enker not wanting to deal with trying to stop the mad drunk Tengu decided instead to grab Star and Ballade, knocking the latter out with a well placed gut punch, and drive back to base. This of course was before realizing he had left the keys on the table with Tengu Man which meant he had to carry them back. Not a big deal that was until the police arrived on the scene. Seeing the bartender point over to him and his two companions while talking to the aforementioned police about the scene caused Enker to break out into a sprint carrying the two over his shoulder as a duo of cops began chasing after him. "God damn it! I knew I shouldn't have listened to Ballade about doing this!" He shouted ducking into an alleyway trying to find a way to evade the cops, get back to the car, and get the hell out of here without alerting the authorities he was a wily bot. Especially the latter since more than likely Mega Man would be called to take him out since this WAS the city where Light Labs resided.

Trying to get a good signal on his teleporter frequency was rather hard in civilian form as he looked behind him noticing the fact that only one cop was following him. This raised many questions, such as where was the other cop, how had he managed to keep up with the robot, and why was his first reaction to run like hell instead of trying to talk things out. None of those mattered however as he got a good lock on the fortress' teleport signal and with a bwip he and his two carry ons were teleported outside of the fortress. Sighing out he quickly shifted back into his armor inserting the three different passwords to show that him, Ballade, and Star Man were back and were allowed access past the various fortress defenses that were laid out.

Coming across Crystal Man in the hallway who gave him a confused look before seeing a passed out Star Man who was quickly dumped onto the jewel based robot master. "Uh...were you at the bar with them?" Enker merely glared which was all Crystal needed to know as Star nuzzled into the other robots chest "Crystal...I'm so fucking wasted...let's make out." The slightly conscious space exploration robot stated moving his face closer to the emerald robot. "No. You're drunk and you'll puke into my mouth." He said moving away through the winding hallways further away from Enker who took his fellow MKN to their designated quarters.

Dumping off Ballade in his charging pod before being pat on the back rather roughly by the one person he didn't want to see tonight. "Yo Enks, how was bar night eh? Heard from 'lade he gotcha to come along with him!" The spike clad killer Punk stated before wheezing as a swift gut punch from Enker made an actual dent in the thick armor. "Oh sorry my hand slipped." Enker said before moving to his own quarters and charging pod wanting this damn day to end already.

 _ **The Next Day**_

Continuing his duty in the watchtower of Wily's fortress he looked onward as Ballade came up once again. "Hey uh...sorry bout last night...do you know if Tengu and Gemini made it out or?" Enker shrugged at the purple armored bot, "Probably. Tengu Man would have shifted out of civilian form and flown back home and Gemini wouldn't have been arrested since they only got violent with each other." Ballade sighed out in relief looking at Enker. "Well that's good...I'm REALLY sorry about what happened I'll make it up to you somehow Enker." Enker let out his own sigh as he looked at Ballade "despite the fact I almost got arrested, laughed at for my civilian form, revealed I was meant to originally be a house cleaning and lab assistant robot to the two biggest gossipers around, hit on at the bar, and listened to your abysmal singing...I somehow had a rather alright time." Enker stated shocking Ballade before he continued on. "However don't ever ask me to supervise you again or I WILL leave you in the bar to rot next time, I will still come but I will also be drinking just as heavily as you." Ballade nodded smiling seeing that everything went well. "Oh I almost forgot, Ballade come here." The prideful killer came over looking down at the shorter bot before hunching over in pain as a fist was lodged into his gut. "THAT is for making me carry your drunk ass back to the fortress in high heels!" Ballade nodded slowly making his way out of the watchtower.

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 **Man how long has it been since I've uploaded anything? Anywho welcome to my series of one shots which I'll be writing every so often so no clear update schedule will be applied to this fic. I'll more or less just add to it when I think of stuff to add.**

 **Anyways I will be taking requests for this fic either through private messages so feel free to send in something the only real guidelines are they have to be related to the Wily Bots, nothing M rated cause we are a proud christian fic and I don't tolerate that kind of language in my home, and lastly no angst that's just a kill joy and I write enough of it on my own time.**

 **Aside from that go wild! Until next time.**


	2. Slash Man Watches Treble

**You fools thought I was probably dead for like another fucking year, you'd be wrong merry late christmas. Thanks GuestTM for your suggestion for this chapter**

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"And so help me if anything happens to him you are DEAD! I'll tear you into so many pieces you won't be able to tell a claw from a circuit board do I make myself clear!" Bass said gripping a very afraid Slash Man, the former of who had never seen him this pissed. "Yes! Crystal! I'll make sure Treble is fine!" Bass dropped the 7th number who nearly collapsed in terror, Bass crouching down to give his purple wolf a few pets on the side of his head speaking much more calmly with him. "Treble I need to go this mission alone, please stay here and don't inconvenience Slash Man too much. I'll get you a treat on the way back if you do ok?" Treble nodded in understanding and Bass smiling pat the side of his head before standing back up, glaring at Slash Man one more time before teleporting out. The animalistic robot master was quite clearly in shock as he shook his head regaining his bearings as he crouched down smiling at the support bot, "well looks like we're gonna be keeping each other company today!" he said reaching a claw out before Treble began to growl giving a glare on a nearly equal level to his owner as Slash retreated his hand holding them up before moving to sit down not really having much else to do today except for watch over Treble. The repurposed nature observation robot able to enter a bit of a trance merely observing what was in front of him nearly laser focused on Treble who was more or less content to just lay down and sleep for now.

A few hours later with nothing happening an alarm went off in Slash's head a call from Shade, jolting up happily he took the call from his fellow 7th number a happy blush on his face as he began to chat with the vampiric robot master. The purple wolf waking from his slumber and looking annoyed at the chatty cheerful caretaker he had wandered off while Slash was distracted deciding to go look for his master. Orders be damned Treble was not going to listen to Slash gush over his crush like a teenage girl. Slash would hang up around 3 minutes later noticing the disappearance of Treble and after a second of shock shot up in utter fear and terror upon remembering Bass' threat. "Shit! SHIT!" He said panicking as he ran out of the room trying to find where the purple wolf went deciding to run right as fast as he could looking in every room around in pure fear. Upon entering one room he noticed Metal Man lounging about spinning one of his blades on his fingers as Slash quickly asked him, "Have you seen Treble anywhere! I was in charge of him and if I lose him I'm dead! Oh fuck maybe he went the other way down the hall way fucking shi-" He was promptly shut up by Metal Man slapping him right across the face having listened to Slash Man's complaints with a bored expression. "Why don't you just track Bass' signal. He hasn't turned it off and Treble would go to him." Slash looked dumbfounded for a moment at his own hubris before quickly running out of the room tracking Bass's signal hoping to find Treble on the way to his location.

Treble currently was on his way to his master trodding slowly as he saw it he was really in no rush to get where he was going, sure he wasn't gonna get the treat he was promised but hey it was worth it to see Slash Man get the shit kicked out of him. Grinning the best he could at the thought as he made his way towards Bass' location. Unbeknownst to the canine Slash Man had managed to catch up being fairly close to the wolf his enhanced sensors noticing a cafe toward the edge of the city where Bass' signal was coming from. Questioning slightly why Bass would have a secret solo mission at a cafe of all places was confusing to the 7th number, but the question was lost as he saw the tell tale purple of Treble. Increasing his speed and overclocking his systems just a bit as he got in range enough to jump onto a tree. Sliding down it's bark just a tad as he charged up his motors before diving down at Treble, managing to catch the wolf and keep a solid grip on it as they rolled a bit sideways into the forest. "Oh hell no! I am not letting you out of my grip! We are going back right now damn it!" Slash man said before teleporting back to the fortress along with Treble the latter of whom had decided to just pout in the robot master's grip. It didn't take even an hour for Bass to come back Slash watching Treble far more vigilantly as the SWN looked over the two glaring a bit at Slash. "Did anything happen while I was gone." The 7th number shook his head scared sweating a bit not wanting to mention his slip up earlier out of sheer fear, "Good. I might get you to do this more." He said mumbling as he knelt down next to Treble, the canine placing his head into Bass' lap who was currently smiling. Taking out a few bolts from somewhere he handfed the wolf based support robot spoiling him just a tad. "You can go now." He said giving a somewhat lighter glare while Treble smirked at Slash Man who quickly made his way out wanting as far away from that duo as possible.

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 **Once again suggestions are open, next chapter however will be my own idea and star Enker again since I may have had like 50 ideas with Enker recently and need to write one of the really silly ones.**


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